Living a Good Life: The Benefits of Boredom and Daydreaming
It goes without saying that this past year and a half has been tough on everyone. I lived every aspect of my life through a Zoom screen, including classes and extracurricular activities, which was an emotionally draining experience and difficult adjustment. I desperately wanted to live as a traditional college student and I could not do so. Once my peers and I entered the fall semester of this year, I was excited to be back in the classroom to appreciate the small joys of learning and not focus so much on the grades received at the end of the day. I wanted to give my attention to the friendships I had developed over the first three years of college and collect as many senior year memories as possible.
In my Management and Organizations class focusing on “Living a Good Life”, we focused on the topic of Time and Attention Management; the New York Times article titled “The Case for Doing Nothing” by Olga Mecking in particular resonated with me. Olga discusses the concept of niksen, a dutch term meaning to exist without a plan or direction. She argues that since our culture does not promote stillness in everyday life, we are incredibly wired and do not have the ability to be still. Olga also mentions how daydreaming can make us more creative and playful as well as further our problem solving abilities. She invites us to resist the “busyness” culture and practice idleness.
Niksen
Growing up in my family, we championed the idea of busyness. We thrived on the challenge of trying to do everything and multitask in many activities. Some of the time, one of my parents would advise me to take a breather and remove some responsibilities from my plate while simultaneously, they would add more tasks for themselves. I grew up in this environment of overachievement and busyness and was taught that time was meant to be filled. During my high school years, I would spend all day at school, attend sports practice, do homework, attend dance classes, and do more homework until my fatigue took over. Productivity and hard work was all that I knew and I was praised by family and friends for continuing to add more responsibilities to my life.
When I was sent home my sophomore year of college due to the pandemic, many of my classes slowed down and I was left with nothing to do for weeks. This was the first time in my life that I had time to fill and nothing to fill it with; I felt that what had made my life meaningful up until that point was gone. I eventually realized during that time when I was living home during the pandemic that I could no longer associate my personality with hard work and intense overachievement. While the pandemic was unexpected and unwanted, it did show me that I need to find other ways to fill my life that are not necessarily work-related but are productive to my overall well-being.
Fast-forwarding to my senior year of college, I have been attempting to practice niksen as much as possible throughout this semester. My goal was to remove distractions from my life and focus on how I am feeling in the present moment. A new motto I have adopted: “If I am not gaining value from this, it is okay to quit.” I now believe there is a lot of power in saying “no” and being strategic about how you spend your time. I used to spread myself as thin as possible because I did not want to say no to any available opportunity. In a way, I wanted to ensure I tried everything and had no regrets. I believe that I have been running on steam for quite a while now and senior year was my time to try stillness. With the lack of distractions, my time and attention focused on the people that I wanted to spend my time with and the experiences I wanted to have.
Since learning about the concept of niksen, I have become much more aware and intentional with my time left at this university. For instance, I began to be more intentional with the time of day I complete my school work; my roommates often gather around our dining room table at night to share stories and laughs. I realized that if I have work to do or extracurricular responsibilities, I would be missing this valuable time of stillness that I have begun to appreciate.
Daydreaming
Another concept that Olga focused on in her article was daydreaming, which is something I had not explored in quite some time.
As mentioned earlier, I was raised in an intense productivity environment that existed not only in my family, but my town and schools. In the second grade, I did not care much for the material I was learning; I much preferred to daydream and spend time in my own head, coming up with scenarios for my life and contemplating crazy possibilities. As a result, I did not pay attention in classes and my teacher noticed. I had a personalized report card each week that I would bring home to my parents to inform them if I was focused and attentive that week of school. It forced me to pay attention to my courses and taught me that daydreaming was a waste of time.
While I enjoy the opportunities that allow me to practice creativity, I feel as if I do not remember how to be creative. As children, we are encouraged to be playful and think of out-of-the-box ideas; children are not yet exposed to the frameworks for how society operates in the world. If you asked a child to draw something, the possibilities for what they would put on paper could be endless (they might not even use paper)! If you asked an adult, they would probably would not understand the question or feel embarrassed by a lack of skill.
These thoughts and more came to mind when reading Olga Mecking’s article. I forgot all the creativity that can arise from the ability to daydream and fantasize. This is something that I have been attempting to include in my life to grow my problem-solving and creative abilities. One way that I have added this into my life is to take at least ten minutes at the end of my day before bed to let my thoughts wander and think about the future. I try to fantasize about an apartment in Chicago, a trip to Australia, or the type of person I might be in ten years. I hope that this helps me think in new ways and cultivates my imagination.
Conclusion
As a result of implementing the concepts of niksen and daydreaming into my everyday life, I feel even more productive and intentional with my time and attention. I give my energy to what I feel is worthwhile and valuable at that time and if that changes, it is okay to say no. It was very difficult at first to have this mindset switch. For most of my life, I have been saying yes to every opportunity and activity that presented itself. Now, I am actively choosing to say no and be intentional about how I allocate my precious time.
My thoughts on time management have also drastically changed. I no longer think of time management as a skill that can be acquired through Google Calendar usage or writing in an agenda planner; it is how a person prioritizes their time towards things that make them feel meaningful and fulfilled. Through much self-discovery, I feel fulfilled spending quality time with friends and family and continue to put that first in my life.
Overall, I am so much more conscious of my everyday actions and life. If there are ways I want to improve myself or make changes in my life, I now feel I have the tools to do so and know what steps to take. I plan to continue embracing stillness and daydreaming into my everyday life.